Sad News

Hello everyone. We are finally settling in in Japan. We love our new home. We miss our families but we are all very happy with things here. LOTS to do and see and we just hope we can get it all in while we're here. Yes, there is that much that we could actually leave in 4 years wishing we had seen something we didn't. Anyway, I'll move on to the subject of this post. If any of you have followed or read our timeline, you know that adoption has not always been something on Eddie's heart. It has been on mine since I was a small child. However, he has broken the news to me that his heart is not in the adoption process. I respect his honesty and his wishes for our family but as you might suspect, I am quite sadened by it. It has been a very tough process to get over this "hurdle" in our lives but we are moving forward and enjoying our wonderful family. There is really nothing I can do about the situation. I wish badly that adoption was something he wanted as badly as I do. But we can't change someone's heart. I know many of you will read this and think he is a horrible person for letting me get this far with it and for taking this away from me. Which is what I thought for a little while too if I'm being honest here. However, once all the anger peeled away, I was able to see that he was just trying desperately to make me happy and thought he'd eventually grow to want it as bad as I do. He wants nothing more than to be able to make mine and our children's dreams come true but thank goodness was honest enough with me NOW before we brought a child into our home. Who knows, someday maybe he'll change his mind and approach me about it. Maybe not. I've accepted that it may never happen. I know that some of you may also be wondering what we'll be doing with the little bit of money we raised toward our adoption. At the moment we have only raised $200 which may sound like a lot to some but for those of us familiar with the adoption world, we know that's a very small fraction of the total costs. Anyway, I have been in contact with a representative from one of the local orphanges here in Japan. We plan to donate the money to the orphanage. I will still be checking back from time to time to follow your journeys. Best wishes to you all and God Bless you and your families.

Allison